Sorry loyal fans?

It seems like once again I have forgotten to update my blog in a very long time.  I am just not good at self expression (all of those who remember the shy, quiet 5/10/15 year old and thought I would never have social skills know this about me).  I will try to update as efficiently as possible (this time):

Today marked the last day of school before a 3.5 week winter break.  Perfect.   I have had 2 days off since August, and one of them was this past Monday (I didn't even have Thanksgiving off).  Say what you want, I was starting to hate those kids so much...  I remember badly wanting to be a dad through high school and university; I was so mistaken.  A bachelor for life I think I stay.  Kids are bad.

On that note, some people think that my quietness is due to a girl.  I wish it were so, but it is not the case (am I the only white person unable to find a girl in Asia?  Possibly.).  I did have a first date about a month ago.  It ended up being a last date too.  I took her (we met at) the local mall for dinner and a movie.  As chance would have it, my entire 13 year old class was there.  Although one student decided to ignore me, and another decided to politely say hi, the rest felt the urge to chase us down the mall shouting questions at us.  Not the warmest first impression.  Thanks boys!!!

I have also become a social networking whore, putting myself on websites devoted for traveling, and I have found myself meeting with and hosting a variety of people from around the world.  This past weekend I had a Hungarian (former communist) staying on my couch.  Great conversations.  In January I have a doctor coming from Belgium.  I assured him that he has to help me get my drug problems more organized.

My visitors that I am most excited come next week though: Julie and Meridel are arriving on the 15th, I am very excited to see them.  More about them after they arrive.

I hope to spend New Years in Bangkok after they leave.

I am also planning a trip to Cambodia in February.

Otherwise things are as they are, smooth and slow.  Nothing remarkable to write about, but things continue pleasantly for me.

If you check this and am wondering how I am (maybe because I do not update it often) email me: kearnals@yahoo.com

That's all folks,

  -Gary

PS. It's currently -3 degrees F in Minnesota?  HAHA SUCKERS!!!!!!!!!

Time flies...

Hello again,

It has been a long time since I last spoke with you, and I have missed you so much.  Things here are flying by, faster and faster it seems, but all is well.  The students are wonderful.  I enjoy our new director of instruction, he is doing a lot of good for the school.  I have spent time with him outside of school as well.  Knowing that he plans to be here for a long time increases the likelyhood that I will stay another year or two (most of my friends are leaving after this year - something that I do not want to see since I have become very attached to a few of them).  All in all, things are pleasant here.  I continue to make new friends (last night I met Mick, an Aussie who loves talking to Americans because he lived there for a few years) and develop the friendships that I already have.  I am busy, but not as busy as last year, and happy.

  -Gary

Good intentions

I have thought about writing an update almost every day for several weeks now; clearly, good intentions are just that.

Things this year are going much more smoothly.  School is much more enjoyable and I have been having fun with most of my classes.  Having firm relationships built, a year of experience, and not needing to plan 6 new classes every night has its advantages.  Additionally, there is a new co-director at our school, and he is taking a lot of initiative to improve things.  Outside of school I have begun to volunteer at PAWS (Phuket Animal Welfare Society), once a week with several students.  It consists mostly of cleaning animals and their cages (perhaps my blog will soon be able to top my sister's in regards to poop stories).  I have also been reading much more for pleasure, something that I have been unable to appreciate since I started college.

Painfully, I must admit that I just do not have the creativity to write, or even to finish the thought of my last paragraph.  I am going to post this, not because it is a complete account, but because if I postpone posting it to revise it, it might never be posted.  Thank you again to all of you who follow this and occasionally send me greetings (Rod and Linda, I got your letter today!).  Have a wonderful day.

What I wake up to...

Just thought I would let you see what I see when I wake up.  The first picture is my view through two doors directly ahead of me.  The second picture is my view through a window, over my balcony, to the left of me.

 

My first new update

Hello everybody.  I hope that you have not missed me as much as I have missed you, let me give you my first new update (and update my contact information):

Summer went well.  I had many wonderful highlights, such as:

1.  Seeing family.  Between the new Becky Siever's wonderful wedding and another classic Isebrand family reunion, I was able to see all of my grandparents, most of my aunts, uncles, and cousins, my sisters and my new niece Meridel.  All in all, some very wonderfun (yes, wonderfun) events.  I can only hope that next summer will be as good in this respect, maybe another Isebrand/Kearns wedding?  We shall see...

2.  See friends.  Almost as cool as seeing my family, was seeing my friends.  I was able to have several roommate and former staff reunions, as well as see many, many other people that I adore.

3.  Professional development.  A week in St. Johnsbury, Vermont made me AP certified and a whole lot smarter.  Also, I got to shoot some guns.

4.  A reintroduction to my xbox.  Yes xbox, I missed you too.  Pulling it out was possibly not my greatest moment, but there was some high quality gameplay.

My flight back went very well, almost horribly, but very well.  After reading my itenerary wrong, I thought that I had a 10 hour layover in Seattle and 16 hour layover in Seoul, South Korea.  In fact, both layovers ended up being less than an hour, and involved me running like a like a headless chicken to get a boarding pass while the rest of the plane boarded.  I was sad to not get the special individual touch tv screens on any of the flights, but was fortunate to have brought a book along.  As it turns out Steve, I can read (no pictures...).

I got in around midnight, got a taxi to my new place, and have started moving in.  Yes, I have a new place.  I really enjoy it, hopefully I will put up some pictures when I am fully moved in (right now: such a mess, such a large, large mess...).  With my new place comes some new contact information:

Both of the school addresses are the same, the second is good for packages:

Gary Kearns

QSI International School of Phuket

PO Box: 432

Phuket 83000

Thailand

 

Or:

Gary Kearns

QSI International School of Phuket

81/4 Moo 1 Chalermprakiat R. 9 Rd

T. Kathu, A Kathu

Phuket 83120

 

My phone number has also changed.  I still have the same cell phone number, but no longer have the landline.  Keep in mind, there is a 12 hour time difference and as much as I love you all, I do not like calls at ungodly hours of the night (or morning).

From America, dial: 011 66 857-833-426  (The first set of numbers is the country code, followed by the cell area code, followed by my actual cell phone number, calling from Thailand you want to add a "0" to the front of the cell phone number.)  I suggest using a calling card, possibly one bought online from: thaitel.com

Ok, the final update, not for the faint of heart or weak of stomach.  Seriously.

...

...

Ok, for those of you still reading, I urge you to consider not reading.  I am merely putting this out there, it is your decision to read it, and you will probably regret it. 

...

...

I am sitting here, leaking liquids, out of 5 bodily holes.  Yes, there are the classic three, and I have also managed to throw up out of both of my nostrils.  I am hoping to start crying later so that I can make the claim that 7 bodily holes are leaking, but we'll see.  Real men don't cry, and I am a real man.  Not sure how I got sick though.  Jet lag and a need to go to the bathroom every 10 minutes have complicated my sleep, but I think I am over the worst of it.  All in all, I am still happy to be back, in spite of future-inevitable-dehydration-by-overactive-leaking-bodily-holes.

There.  That was an honest update.  I hope that you are happy and enjoyed it.  Enjoy your meal and solid foods.  I wish I could...

Misconceptions

Grandpa: This is Gary, he's going to Thailand to meet a Chinese girl.

Grandpa's friend: They're not Chinese girls, they're Taiwanese.

Why I am a good person.

It's 6:43 am here and I have already done so many good things.  I really am an amazing person.  First, I woke up at 4 to take a friend to the bus station in Phuket town.  I hate driving in Phuket town, but I did it.  Why?  Because I am wonderful.  Then, after getting lost on the way home, I started talking to a Buddist monk.  He wanted to go to Rawai, the same place that I was trying to go to, so I gave him a ride.  Why?  Because I am amazing.  Even though I was scared that he was going to secretly be a killer and that I would die early in my summer break, I did it anyways.  (Yes, I know, I am incredible).  Now, I am going to sleep a little bit, only to wake up and help a friend move.  Why?  Because I am awesome.

On a slightly more humble note, this is probably my last blog from my first year in Thailand.  I ended the school year successfully (although partially absent).  I have recovered from my "highly contageous viral infection" (also known as "pink eye").  And I am tying up loose ends before finally leaving in 66 hours.  I will see many of my faithful followers soon.  I miss you mostly.

One week of school left...

...and the doctor told me not to work for a week. (I have pink eye.)
This is really unfortunate because I was actually done teaching and trying to help students make up missing units. That, and I will be missing prom, the end of year staff party and two field trips in the next week. (At least I should be better in time for graduation.) Oh well...I'm off to pick up my suit for prom, its custom tailored (and fully paid...). I'll be home in a few weeks. I look forward to seeing everybody.

Proof that I am a good teacher.

Beginning my earth science lesson today, I began with review from yesterday: Describe the big bang.

Me: Nat?

Nat: The thing in England with the clock.

Me: No, that is Big Ben.  Jeremy, what is the big bang?

Jeremy: Kolean singing gloup.

Me: What?

Jeremy: Kolean singing gloup, pop stars from Kolea (Korean singing group, popstars from Korea).

Me: No Jeremy, we are not talking about the same Big Bang.  Kevin?

Kevin: Bom bom.

Me: No.  That is the worst answer yet.  Jim?

Jim: Can I draw a picture?

Me: Ok.

Jim (comes up and draws two circles on the board): The big bang was a meteor hitting earth that caused all of the dinosaurs to die.

Me: No, not the right answer Jim.  Mino, want to give it a try?

Mino: The explosion that made everything.

Me: Ok, I'll take it.

I don't care Wai

Tonight, while playing pool at a bar, a girl wai'ed me.  Now before you think about this too much, let me explain what a wai is.  A wai is a polite way of greeting and ackowledging someone, which consists of putting your palms together, your thumbs at your chin and then bowing your head a little bit.  The correct response is to wai back.  So I did it, and I did it holding my pool stick between my palms (maybe not proper, but I usually don't set things down to wai).  The problem is that I was standing under a ceiling fan.  So faster than I could respond, I raised the pool stick into the fan which knocked it back into my face, which just about knocked me out.  Have I learned a lesson?  Probably not.

Next year's my year!

Well, the results are in, and its official, I did not win this yearbook's "Best Teacher" award.  Its ok though, because next year is my year, I can feel it.

You're dreamy, Mr. Gary

Two students admitted to having dreams about me this past week, although one described her's as "a nightmare which made me cry."  The first student told me that she had a dream that there were two of me.  She left my class only to run into me in the hall.  The second student told me that in her dream, all I did was yell at her.  Which dream was the nightmare that caused a student to cry?  I will let you decide.

In other news, I went to the market today and ran into four people I knew from outside of school (two were together and two were their by themselves).  Situations like this have happened several times lately, and I really enjoy them because they give me a greater sense of belonging.

School is going ok right now.  I have exactly 5 weeks left, only about three week of instruction though.  I believe that I will be leaving here on June 25th.  Watch out USA, here I come...

Some positive things.

Here are a few positive experiences that I have had lately:

- I tried deep fried pig skin (I quit eating after I found one with a hair).

- I successfully made my mother's custard in a friend's oven.  The oven was a little whompy, but it worked out well.  Very delicious.

- I had Bailey's for the first time (Bailey's and milk actually), it was really good.  Then I had Bailey's again (this time just with ice).

- I took a free certification class for Thai language and culture (it was actually poorly run, really boring and I learned nothing, but now I am certified).

- I ate duck for the first time, I think.

- I was faught over by several mothers of Thai children my age (they want me as a son-in-law).

- I did a little clubbing with a Canadian friend.  I got a massage, back cracking, and steamed towel while washing my hands after going to the bathroom.

- I convinced a girl that I was gay so that she would leave me alone (don't even begin with the jokes).  Now people think the Canadian is gay too.

- I befriended my mom on facebook.

Another bad day.

  Although I have refrained from discussing negative things in my blog, I would like to share about some of the difficult things that have happened at work recently.  Morale at my school is very very low.  My director "does not believe in discipline" and it shows.  Students can walk over teachers, and nothing will be done about it.  Teachers can also walk over other teachers, and nothing will be done about it.  People that speak up about it in staff meetings are silenced and told to talk to my director about it in private.  People that go to my director in private are told that they can only worry about themselves and it is up to them to have a positive morale.  I have gone to him several times, always with the school's best interests in mind, and have been treated like a child.

  Last week, my director's boss came into town (this was the man who interviewed me for my position, and I know he cares a lot about the school).  We were given the option to meet with him if we wanted to, and I took it.  I stressed how the school was suffering; he agreed with me and said that he had talked to several staff members about it, but that it was my director's responsibility to fix the problems.

  Today, after a meeting with his boss, my director wanted to speak with me in private.  He reaffirmed that he knew that we did not agree on the discipline issue, but that his position was that discipline was not always the best option (so an alternative...?).  I was told that if I wasn't happy with the way the school was being run, that I did not have to sign a contract to come back next year (his boss did tell me last week that I had to stay on for another year, so I am getting mixed signals).  End of discussion.

  I am stunned with disbelief.  I have been told by several staff members that the only way to survive is to stop caring.  But I don't really want to stop caring.  If I didn't care, I would not have become a teacher.

  Real like kinda sucks sometimes.  Why did I have to graduate?

My sad story.

This week has been my most difficult of the year.  I am not going to go into detail, but it has been six weeks since we had a day off and both the students and the teachers here are needing it.  Just six more days until a break...

Starting off my day well...

Well, here is the story:

Today on my way to work, a crow flew over me and dropped something big.  At first I thought it was a giant solid poop that had bounced off of me, but birds don't have solid waste.  So I looked down, and what did I see?  A big, bloody toad laying in my lap.  I had to turn around and change my clothes.  Hopefully this is not an omen for the day ahead of me.

Boring Update

Well, there is not a whole lot new with me.  School is in the grind, same old, same old.  But there is one interesting new thing that I have found out: I will be teaching advanced placement (AP) calculus next year.  This may come as a surprise to many of you, especially Dr. Wetzell who last taught me math (a sad year indeed), but I am excited for it and already putting together my syllabus.  I will also be attending an AP conference this summer, hopefully in Vermont.  More updates later.

Momma's coming to town

With my mom finally back safe in America, I decided to post some of the highlights from her visit, if you would like more details, her phone number is 952-221-8156 and she can tell you all about it.

Bon Appetite

Well, I finally had the opportunity to try mealworms and crickets.  The mealworks weren't too back.  No flavor really.  A slight bit of grease as I bit into them, but otherwise no flavor.  Easy to swallow.  The crickets were a little different.  Also no flavor, except for the slight bit of grease as I bit into them.  The texture was more dry though, and I had to drink some water to get them down.  I did not have the guts to try the cockroach or larger locust (as seen in the picture).  Maybe next time.  The best part: soon after buying the fried bugs to eat a ran into a few primary students from the school.  I offered them a taste (at which they looked excitedly into the bag) and then I got 5 screams in unison.  I am such a nice guy.

Thai Copperfield and other short stories...

The Story of Thai Copperfield:

  I'd like to begin with a story about Thai Copperfield.  Never heard of him?!?  What a shame, let me enlighten you.  Thai Copperfield is a Thai man that dresses like a cowboy and does magic tricks.  Most of the students at QSI know him, besides being a hot commodity at birthday parties, Thai Copperfield can be randomly seen all over the island.  My first time meeting Thai Copperfield was at a student's birthday party.  This past Saturday I went to the Marriott in Kamala for said party.  Thai Copperfield was a pretty good magician, but an even better performer, his jokes kept most of the students laughing, even if they had seen his tricks before.  Half-way through the show, Thai Copperfield put his red hankerchief into his hands and lost it.  Where did it go?  Well I guess I must have had it, because I was called forward.  Even though I stand in front of the students five days a week, it still felt awkward to go up front (but they cheered for me, so that was encouraging).  Thai Copperfield checked my shirt pocket, but his hankerchief was not there.  Then he checked my left and right sleeve, but still no hankerdhief.  Where was it?  Well, he bent down, unzipped my fly, reached in and pulled out a hankerchief.  (I didn't have the heart to tell the students that it was not the same hankerchief, but he in fact stole my red one that I keep in my pants.)  An awkward trick and an awkward moment in my life later, I walked away as my students continued to cheer for me.  (Asians don't share the same feelings of physical boundaries that Westerners like myself have.)

(PS. This is the third photo I own where you can see that the hair on the back of my head is thinning...)

The Story of Skyping with Meridel:

  My sister Julie and I have been planning a time for me to Skype with my niece Meridel.  Today, I received an email agreeing on a time and giving my her skype name.  I signed on 8 hours early to make sure that I had her screen name added, and by chance they were on.  So I skyped with them early.  It was my first time seeing my niece in a non-picture form.  I enjoyed it.  (We skype again tonight, at our originally planned time.)

The Story of the Thai Postal System:

  Yes, my stories are getting lamer and lamer.  I mailed four postcards on Monday.  Impressive because it is my first time mailing anything from here, home.  Four people will be receiving postcards in the next two or three weeks.  Don't feel bad if this isn't you, I only mailed things to people who put specifically requested it because I felt obligated to.  Don't feel bad if it is you and you now think that I only sent you a postcard out of obligation, I was really going to send you one anyways.  Really.

The Story of Celebrating Chinese New Year:

  Ok, I didn't actually celebrate the Chinese New Year at all, but I watched as some people lit fireworks that were hanging from a powerline.  Why they did this?  I don't know.

The Story of Me Telling Stories:

  This is what happens when I am allowed to ramble...

Good News, Bad News

I apologize for the lack of updates, nothing unusual has happened recently...until last night.  My mom taught me to begin such stories with "everything is ok" so the good news is: "everything is ok."

The bad news?   As I was riding my motorbike home last night I was hit by what I assume was a drunk driver.  No injuries to my self, a small injury to my bike.  I was going 60 km/h on the side of a straight road with no one else around when a speeding car came from behind and side-swiped me.  I didn't realize what had happened until afterwards.  I looked to the side where he hit me and saw a couple pieces of his car fly to the side, and as I slowed down to make sure that I was alright, I watched him (or her) speed off.  I need to get a new back peg for my bike, but otherwise everything is ok.  And I repeat: there were no injuries to my self (including emotional ones, I think I am going to make it through this one).

In other news, the next month with be a busy one, three separate connections from Bethel will be in the Phuket area over the next two weeks and then I will see my mom who is coming to visit me in a month.  All in all, I am very excited for the near future.

I miss most of you.  -Gary.